Thursday, 21 May 2015

STUTTERING IS NOT A GENETIC DISORDER

Hello:

On May 20,2015 in the Toronto Globe and Mail, in the Life & Arts section on Page L7 an article entitled, --- [Research to shed light on stuttering causes, treatments.] appears.

Unfortunately the article concludes that there is a genetic component to this speech impediment.  The real cause is fear.   Each word that we utter requires a decision on our part and it is the fear of making this decision that causes the stuttering.

Many times the reasons are almost self-evident and the cure is relatively simple but other times it is very complex and it is entirely reasonable that a genetic factor should be looked upon as the cause when other reasons escape us.

A simple cause occurs when a child comes home from playing with his peers and uses the word --- fuck --- and is slapped in the face for using such a vulgar expression.   This happened far more often in the past then it does now-a-days.

Oupermissive society has caused many other problems but it has helped to reduce the incidence of stuttering in many parts of the world.   One way to know that this is happening is if the child begins to stutter when trying to say the words fun, full, furious etc.   

That is, --- any word that begins with the letters fu, because the child becomes afraid that he or she will use the profane word and be slapped again for his or her mistake.  It can even start when he tries to say any word that begins with the letter --- F.

Another problem as the child becomes older is the knowledge that when you are speaking to a group of people you are exposing your brain to the scrutiny of your listeners and this stress can also lead to stuttering.   On a minor scale but still damaging for the speakers emotional health is the nervous speaker who is shaking as they speak.

Obviously there are many reasons to develop a stutter and Josh's problem appears to be rather deeply engrained.   Obviously he is capable of long periods of fluid speech and this fact should indicate that it is not a genetic problem.   If it was it should be happening most of the time or even all of the time, --- but not so infrequently.

So it becomes necessary to determine what stresses and how much of them are responsible for his stuttering.  Keep in mind that the young boy may not be willing, or able to tell you why he stutters.

But a capable investigator can deduce clues from when he stutters and when it started to find the reasons for the stuttering and try to overcome them for the child so afflicted.

The idea that this problem has a genetic component is easily understood when one realizes that we have failed to understand that irrational and distorted reactions to fear can affect the human mind so completely.
   

Saturday, 16 May 2015

BE A SEEKER NOT A HIDER

Hello:

A few days ago in one of the local papers a guy had at least 3 women on the go with his "open" marriage.   One of which was the real thing with one or two children.  One of the "other" women wanted to know if she should continue with this situation. 

Here is my answer.

Obviously you do not have a very high opinion of yourself to ask such a question.  Why not try this.  Since he is lying to you about his real intentions, [to obtain as much sex as possible with the least amount of commitment to as many women as possible], tell him that you have two other lovers and see what his reaction is.   Or tell him that you would like to become a Mother and see if he suddenly distances himself from you.   

Rather than waste time with the above two suggestions, I would be more inclined to dump the guy as soon as possible.   When it comes to finding a new man, some of them are more fragile than you might think and they have a tough time with rejection.   

Hold your head up high and find someone who you think would make a good partner and if he seems reluctant to show any interest, step up to the plate yourself and show him that you are interested in him.  If that scenario fails, --- move on to the next best choice until you do succeed.

For those men who have a high level of fear about being rejected, such bold action on your part might be just what is needed to break the ice.   You are much better than you have been giving yourself credit for.  Good luck and do your best to remember this simple fact.  There are too many hiders in this world and not enough seekers.